The Assault Of Consent
A reel surfaced on Instagram recently showed the crude reality of the world that we all are a part of. The reel was about how a woman is not safe anywhere, neither in public places, nor in their own home. It is extremely abhorrent to know how everyone goes through harassment of this kind at least once in their life, irrespective of the caste, creed, religion and gender.
My wrinkles and my folded skin were seductive?? My yell and age weren’t an obstacle when it came to his lust. For a 70-year-old like me , he was like a son to me but for him I was nothing lesser than a creature with a vagina. My weak body tried to fight but his strength overpowered me. The 15 mins of his pleasure was no lesser than a walk-through hell for me. There was a new day, people moved on so did he, but i was still terrified in my overly weakened body but life goes on. That night, that pain was buried in one corner of my heart ; every day I fought against the nightmares and never gave up to them.
Did the lines written above make you uncomfortable? Did you bring your eyebrows closer and then moved your head in resentment? Did a tinge of uneasiness creep inside you? If reading an experience has this impact on a reader, can we understand the disgust and pain that the person who would’ve experienced this, is carrying?
According to a study by NCRB, sexual harassment cases have only increased in India over the past few years. The maximum number of sexual harassment cases were reported in Uttar Pradesh, followed by Madhya Pradesh. This remains to be a depressingly common phenomenon as at least one person is sexually harassed in every twelve minutes.
In the secluded walls of the washroom , lie my body groaning in pain . My feminine instinct gave them the right to torture my body. As I came out dragging my lifeless body , I looked upon the panels of society where man is always the symbol of strength and power and here, I was a man wounded and victimised who wanted to yell the “victims don’t have any gender.
Irrespective of the victim’s or abuser’s sexual orientation, male victims too are more prevalent in the society than most people realize. According to a study by Jennifer Kuadli, approximately 16% of males in juvenile prisons are sexually abused, while over 60% have encountered a threat of the same.
Uncle brought me chocolate!!! Uncle was good until one day she slid his hands down my panties. I screamed but he shut my mouth. The pain was unbearable. I don’t know the price of the chocolate was so high that it traumatised my nights and left me wailing in the days.
It is highly disgusting to see how kids are tormented in ways that would scar them psychologically for the rest of their life. A data released by NCRB states that around 109 children are sexually abused everyday. Are we “Humane anymore?
“I belonged in a brothel “ , he yelled as he tormented my self respect by mutilating the parts of my body . The value of consent was mocked again and I hated being what I am ,a little more.
While sexual harassment affects women in large numbers, a community that suffers inexplicable harm from being excluded from the dictionary of victims is the transgender community. According to a survey conducted by the IndiaSpend, many gender non-conforming children drop out of the schools owing to the harassment. Out of the 2169 respondents in the survey, about 616 respondents without education were more vulnerable to violence than those with education.
Extreme forms of assaults like Nirbhaya of 2012 portray the satirical image of the society where Goddesses are worshipped , while thousands of silent cries of assaulted victims go unnoticed. Be it those who are groped in the public places, or those who are predated upon in their workplaces, or those who think twice before wearing their favorite skirts or those whose heart race with fear if they are alone on the roads late at night.
Even after 73 years of independence, a victim thinks twice before reporting a case and almost 8 years to hang the predators of one of the most gruesome gang assaults and almost their entire life to move over that unfateful incident. No one keeps a pepper spray in their purse out of choice nor does one continuously gaze at their surroundings for anyone suspicious out of fun. The decades and decades of the fear, pain and several lessons by the Mom, prepare their girls on how to stay safe. Even now, when someone is assaulted, the question is always punched upon how their clothes, behavior, posture lure the predators.
In the several instances of Indian cinema, the value is often mocked upon; be it romanticizing the assault as an attribute to masochism of the predator or justifying it with the un-sanskaari way of living of the victim. It is more than horrifying to know that forced sexual intercourse categories are the top most searched in the pornographic websites and; It was a big question on our humanity after the nerve chilling case of “Kathua” in 2018 gained attention of the media , and it trended on the pornographic sites. How long will the hunger of sexual gratification drive humans on the verge of being a monster??
You may have come to the end of this blog, but the saga of the “the assault of consent” still continues in many victims’ lives. As a part of this already tarnished society, let’s take a step forward by showing our support and kindness to the ones suffering even silently around us and condemning any form of abuse starting from eve-teasing to slurring cuss words!
It’s always better to do something rather than be a silent spectator because in the end, we are silently standing behind the predators which sooner or later will prey on us all.
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Written with a vision by Avilipa and Shrikriti.
Designed with love by Alishma.
